Little boys are braver than I thought

Well it happened.

I had my little dude snipped below the diaper tabs today. Oh, the agony!!!

I have had anxiety about this since before he was even born. See, I don't handle pain, surgery, blood...mostly pain...very well. And I'm such an empathetic person (I know, I'm so fucking nice) that if someone else feels pain, I TOO feel their pain. I can't help it! It was like I had a little pecker getting picked today.

So my anxiety had been building and today I was almost hurling in the waiting room with my little guy in my arms. Once again, so thankful K was there with me. I tried not to let it be known too much, but I needed him there for MY support. I'm sure E was happy also, but in the sense of selfishness, I was calmed--sort of--with his presence. They came in and took E from me. The whole process was about 10 minutes and he came back out bright-eyed and no tears. I was so relieved. Then we got  home...

Shit. Worst fucking moment a mother has to experience is seeing their child in utter pain and not being able to explain to them what happened and that the pain is only temporary. Between the wails he looked up at me with this big, gorgeous eyes, pleading with me to make it stop and I couldn't. I couldn't. I broke down and started crying with him. I tried not to. I tried to be the stronger one for us. I know I needed to be because that's what a mom does. It's my job to be the stronger of us two.

The only thing I knew to do was wrap him up, bring him in close to me, and crawl in bed in my dark bedroom while listening to the rain hit the window (so literary, right?). We laid chest to chest and I rubbed his back and he slept for four hours, waking to whimper only a few times. It is now 11:37 at night and I am happy to say that little E is a smiling, happy little boy again!

How did he do that? I cut my finger on the damn Similac formula foil-cover 3 days ago and I'm still bitching about the pain. E had SURGERY on his PENIS and he was sitting on the couch coo'ing to his dad a mere 6 hours later.

My dude is a brave Motha' ... watch out Chuck Norris!